Guess who's knocked up?

(My disclaimer: Due to spending nearly all waking hours with twins in my sight and the remaining hours with two baby monitors nearby, I may accidentally reference every pregnancy I speak of for the rest of my life in the plural.  For example, "Hey Krista, when did you say them their peoples BABIES are gonna be borned?" is how I would now inquire about a friend pregnant with one child.) 

Here are your clues for Preggy:
-dark brown, long-ish, wavy hair
-licensed to work in a position helping others live happy, healthy, lives
-not very tall
-has the "I can talk to anyone & make them feel comfortable" gene (that some of us lack)
-drives a Honda
-lives in a state that starts with an "I"
-attended Illinois State University
-stays in close touch with her family, including siblings
-aspires to raise a free-thinking, kindhearted, confident child, just like her


And clues for the Significant Other:
-has shorter, lighter, redder, hair
-works in a field that makes people happy, but in a different way
-a tad taller than the pregnant one
-less vocal, more of a hands-on technical type
-drives a vehicle manufactured by Americans
-previously lived in Springfield, Peoria, & Champaign
-talks on the phone or texts Mom on a near daily basis
-aspires to raise a bright, industrious, athletic child, just like her

     If you guessed that my wife, Krista, is pregnant AGAIN, ALREADY,

Symphony of Shrieking

A riddle: If a baby cries in a bedroom and Daddy is in the basement doing laundry...  does it really make a sound?  I'm pretty sure it doesn't until you get in the doorway where the baby can see your face and THEN it starts to really "make a sound" after five minutes of quiet whining.  They are starting to recognize when I am here and when I am gone, which also means that when I leave the room they take notice and let me know how they feel about it.  This coincides with Ellison's discovery of her ability to make high-pitched shrieking noises for "Come get me" minutes five through seven.  Minute one to two are arm flailing, pacifier removal. Minute three to four are lower pitched whining.  Then after shrieking it's full-fledged screaming-crying with a focus on flapping her arm on the side closest to her sleeping brother until minute ten at which point Henry wakes up and the cycle starts over. It becomes like one of those awful, campfire songs that you sing in a round, except Henry is that super sonic only dogs can hear it soprano that sits behind you every week that you go to mass, no matter where you choose to sit. 

And now that Ellison has started to reach arm flapping point, I'm going to go get her dressed and ready...  today is one of those interesting days when Mommy has an important meeting at work and Daddy scheduled a doctor's appointment. The good news is even though they don't like when I walk out of a room and leave them, they still prefer the company of any super, smiley stranger that makes squeaky sounds in their face to any toy or bottle or parent in the world...  for about five minutes anyway.  Then their eyes start to dart around until they finally find my face from across the room and smile in this relieved, contended way that makes me forget that I haven't slept right in five months, teething gel, 3am baby tylenol, and 500 loads of cloth diapers.

Farmer"s Market

Back in September we went to the the Farmer's Market in downtown Bloomington, just like we intend to do every Saturday in the summertime...  except this time we actually woke up, got ourselves AND 2 BABIES dressed, fed, and out the door and downtown before it ended.  Okay, so we only had one hour before it closed, but it still counts.  You'll notice the stylish Baby Bjorn that I'm wearing and the single stroller, which indicates we had not yet bought the monstrous double jogging stroller that I now love with all my heart. At this point, Henry had finally gotten big enough that there was no longer hope for both of them to lie side by side in the stroller and share a seat belt. For some reason, this particular day I chose to attach the 3lb heavier baby to my shoulders and spinal column.
  We also made it out another Saturday but drove there because the weather guy said it would rain AT 1PM. We got the double stroller out, loaded 'em up, walked over to the row of vendors, and it instantly started pouring down rain.  We jogged a block over and took cover in CVS pharmacy where we shopped for junk we didn't need for a half hour before it stopped raining.  At that point, I was completely content with my shopping finds for the day and ready to head home.  Alas, CVS did not have fresh basil so we pulled the shade over their heads to block any remaining sprinkles and headed back our to finish our shopping.  This time, only one person stopped us to ask, "Are they twins?" to which I always want to say, "Who? Henry and I? That's very kind but I'm his father."

The Grandma Edie Gig

My Gig as Grandma Edie..
Started officially on June 5, 2012, an hour or so after midnight. There is somethng magical about meeting a new human being, holding them in your arms, minutes after their entrance into the world. And meeting two new humans is double magic.
Henry and Ellison are the new sunrise that never sets on our family. With their wonder-filled eyes and smiles that light up their faces and those of everyone around them, our twins are a source of promise for us all.
Being their Grandma Edie means I can give them a new nickname every week, teach them how to make sand castles and Christmas cookies and introduce them to all the good books.  It's a gig I'm going to enjoy.

When Daddy gets the flu....

you spend a little more time in your crib whining after you wake up and a little less time playing "I'm gonna eat that tummy" on the floor with him.

you practice holding your own bottle with a pillow and a towel under it because Daddy keeps dozing off.

you spend a lot more time with Mommy from 11pm to 6am.

Reunions of all sorts.

Today we attended our first family reunion with our twins.  It was a bit chilly so they wore bear coats and fleece blankets and passed from one relative to another around the bonfire at Weldon Spring State Park.  They were great sports and I can't recall either of them crying at any point.  

I have noticed this before, but no change is ever so noticeable as it is when in the comfort of your family: Having children changes everything.

Happiness in a Leaf Blower

When you're a new Dad, whether stay-at-home or working, there are certain activities that you don't do as often (no, I was not referring to that).  One of the saddest losses for me has been my use of power tools, which decreased sharply, NOT for lack of jobs that need done desperately, but because their use may:
A. Wake sleeping babies even if you work on the other side of the house, outdoors, underground
B. Deafen conscious babies if you try blaring Barney on surround sound to mask use of power tools nearby
C. Blind the babies if you try to wear them in a Baby Bjorn and use a reciprocating saw
D. Cause damage to growing bones and joints if you allow them to "help Daddy" use a framing nailer

Parents Birthdays Lacking Post-Baby?

My wife asked me the day after her birthday, "Did you forget it was my birthday yesterday?" In reality, I was painfully aware of it for weeks. I felt trapped when gift shopping crossed my mind.  The idea of taking twins to the mall isn't frightening by itself but to go shopping for an amazing birthday gift for the woman that outdoes her self every holiday for me WITH TWINS was overwhelming.  Meijer seemed to offer nothing worthy of her, thus looking for a personal gift post-grocery shopping with tired babies proved fruitless.  Shopping online only works if I'm ordering more of something that I already have such as toiletries and cleaning products, appliance replacement parts, or any baby stuff with a recognizable brand name.  Otherwise, it's a crap shoot of Chinese postage labels, bad stitching, and strange, "not exactly urine", smells. 

Why do I think anyone cares about me?

April 2012

If you're reading this you may want to know why I think my thoughts are worth sharing. This will be a small summary of a long story but I'll offer up the highlights of what's important:

1. I'm expecting twins in June or July.
2. I have 2 small dogs, Ollie and Jack.
3. I am preparing to be a stay-at-home Dad.
4. I am remodeling my home myself, including a bathroom addition.
5. I was laid off of my job of 5 years the day after Christmas 2011.
6. I am male nurse.
7. I live with my wife and a roomate, her best friend, Nick.
8. My wife is a therapist.
9. I'm trying to join (they see "infiltrate") the local "Mothers of Multiples".
10. I sell books online that I purchase secondhand.
11. I'm practicing being Catholic again so I can get my babies baptized.
12. I currently babysit a 5 month old child for 40-50 hours a week.
13. I train Ollie, my miniature daschund/miniature pinscher mix in agility.
14. I am an odd, hyperactive, liberal, multitasking, organizing, scatterbrain.
15. I was diagnosed as OCD at age 15 so I'm going to stop on #15.

So we'll see how exciting my life actually seems when translated into blog form.
Cheers.